I.

When I met the president
I felt Mean
Girls when Lindsay goes
to the mall
and all the teens become
animals to her
historical teens at the watering hole.
I saw the hand
that was shaking his hand
my hand
and I saw it pulling at his face
to see him better
to see his face better
a droid or
he was nice but
instead he told me
he was proud of me
and then he told the girl
next to me
that he was
proud of her too
and the boy next to her
and the girl next to him
and I was like wow
what is it like
to be proud
of so many people
at once?
Is that history or
just the same way a bird trapped
in Costco feels about sunlight?

I was blushing everywhere
visually oh he does
sound like that.

My friends think I am here
in the capital doing amazing things
but imagining a droid face for me.

II.

Dana came out of the Smithsonian castle.
I stayed in the bush by the roses.

“Don’t go in there. All that’s there is a cafe
and George Washington's hair.”

III.

I do dangerous things for you
like I think:
                For America everything can rot but this:

at night, Lizzy tells the others
to translate thru me
because my voice
has the lowest timbre
and without her hearing aids
she cannot hear much but me.

Everything can rot but this:
Emily said that my low self
esteem is just the devil in me.

All I can say back
is that I fear when I wake
in the middle of the night to pee
is the only time
I feel most alive.